Situation Normal: All F*d Up

We are sheetrocked and well on our way to a normal looking home at this juncture. You may recall our linoleum in the kitchen:

And then, having dug up that linoleum, the extra linoleum we enjoyed beneath this layer:

No longer yellow, brown instead! A charming transition. And then we had nothing of the sort on the floor:

Let's play a game: wtf is that? Tar? Mold? Rot? Burns? I honestly can't answer, it was smooth except for the weird tacks that presumably gripped the linoleum or possibly carpet that went in prior to the yellow linoleum but after the brown linoleum. If you're confused, I think that only means you've still got a grip and I have obviously lost mine.

Then we had to fill in the hole!

Remember this charming moment?

Well this is what it looks like now:

 Nestor & Xiomara are beautiful angels from heaven. I was concerned the floor was going to be 2 different colors, but then I remembered I was painting them and didn't care. Welllll it turns out if you sand the floors you get hardly any gaps in the planks. Great for seamless stained floors! Bad for rustic chic. These were the options:

And this is the gorgeous result!

Sorry I don't have a better photo - I forgot to take a photo of how great it looks in the living room so I have to use this photo of the secondary without trim. Woohoo.

Additionally I have been sneaking into my neighbors' yards to photograph their gorgeous flowers in an endeavor to be inspired myself. So far I have decided I truly love these Zinneas (maybe something else?) and mom brought me to Home Depot and I discovered Gardenias! I'm a real pioneer, and like a pioneer, I'm going to take credit for them.

I wish I could figure out how to grow those crazy wild sunflowers you see on the side of the road everywhere in Texas. They are apparently weeds and I have designs to dig some up and make off with them.

And in the last bit of news, my tile came in! Let me just remind you what the floor looked like just last week:

A bit lumpy.

So you'll imagine my shock and surprise when my contractor's tile people not only did not float the floor (float means make flat - not always level, it can be floated but also pitched, but it's consistent is the point), but they installed the tile like they had never seen tile in their lives.

 See how it has a gorgeous plaid pattern? Yeah. No. It's not supposed to look like that. This is what it's supposed to look like:

See how the floor is nicely spaced and even and doesn't have grid lines on it? Yes, me too.

In other news I had to break in:

It was shockingly easy... so I'm replacing this door.

And we have started cabinetry, which really just means I have been drawing on the walls

But I also have the most glorious kitchen cabinet plan ever concocted by another human being thanks to my beautiful friend Allie Wood of Allie Wood Design Studio.

LOOK AT THESE BEAUTIES!

Pay no attention to the pen marks - they're just to make sure the carpenters fully understand.

And last but not least, I protested my Property Taxes! I won! It took 30 minutes! Am I living a charmed life? I look around me and think... nope, it's still hard.

Steady Improvement

After the wild ride of last week I'm surprised you're back, readers. The bare bones of this house were spooky and it was certainly concerning. Since then, however, the tides have changed to include some amazing generosity from affiliated parties (namely my coworker and bff John Wilson, and all my new boyfriends who have generously donated or discounted sheetrock, labor, insulation, appliances, etc: got a lot of IOU dates at this point).

So! Super update! We have doors:

They are sexier than I planned, I'm happy.

We have also filled in some holes:

And, since you've stayed put, I'll tell you we had a fantastic and very exciting insulation party where we insulated all the exterior walls and some interior ones, too! Very exciting! So we were able to...

Ta daa! Sheetrock! It got better, they primed it, too, so the walls are kind of a grayish color. But the best we saved for last. We. Painted. The. Exterior.

As you'll recall, this was my ugly house:

(not pictured: a large pile of garbage to remove landscaping that stuck to the house)

And after a couple coats of Sherwin Williams Alabaster....

...
...
...
...
...

BASICALLY DONE.

Here's the large pile of garbage:

And now for the blooper reel:

Amazingly easy to remove, a pity I had to do it myself after primer.

Why is there an extra 2 inches? Some things we cannot know.

This is where the closet door goes. So.

Don't get too judgy on my guys, though: bloopers are all part of the job. Absurdity is the essence of renovation.

Danger Zone

My people, I have been gone, I have been delinquent, but I have so, so much to update.

You'll recall the house has looked, to date, like this:

 Scary yellow bricks

 Missing scary yellow bricks

 Those are wee paint samples! If you can tell the difference between them: you're doing better than most!

 Garbage walls

 Holes

 Insulation

 Problematic sheetrock

Get ready for the grand reveal:

 We demo'd all the sheetrock... and also made a big pile of trash. The neighbors were thrilled!

Sorry it doesn't... look  better.